Explore.
People often talk about living life to the fullest. It’s one of those phrases thrown around casually and nonchalantly, a generic mantra to live by. I have lately been thinking about what it really means to have a life fully lived. Perhaps it’s the new year, or the alarming number of friends who have loved ones with newly discovered illnesses this month, or just a time of transition for me. Whatever it is, it’s been weighing on my mind.
My mom shared this video with me – it looks to be a travel advertisement for Iceland perhaps? (an effective one at that – Iceland’s quickly moving up my long list of places to visit!). But what I love so much about this video is the message that it contains, summed up in the last line: in our final days, when we revisit our short time on Earth, we need to feel fulfilled. Happily drifting away from a life fully lived. Cue the goosebumps – this hits me like a truck every time I think about it. We only have one chance at this life.
Having a life fully lived will necessarily mean something different for each and every person. It is as individual as a fingerprint. But it must start with laying down some groundwork. Taking the time to prioritize and dream and organize and seek out what it means for you personally. First and foremost we’ve got to identify what it is that fills us up – what makes you happy? What brings meaning and satisfaction to your days? Too few of us put in the effort to stop and think about this. We run and run, chasing the dreams that are expected of us. Regardless of what each person’s end goal is, the problem lies in not evaluating the steps taken to get there; in not stopping from time to time to reevaluate our trajectory.
Set aside some time to wonder.
I am taking some time to think about what it will mean for me to live a life fully lived. At least at this very moment in my life. Inevitably, this will change as time goes on, circumstances change, we change as human beings. For me, for now, here are five suggestions for what I think will lead to a live well lived.
1. Pursue a career that you are passionate about. No amount of money will be worth slogging away day after day at a job that you are not passionate about. (Okay at some point I’m sure there is some amount of money that would be worth it but that’s beside the point and inapplicable to 99.99% of us!) At some point we have to each assess our goals and interests and think about devoting some time and effort into pursuing a career that ignites us, that excites us and fills us full of opportunity and creativity and fulfillment. Early 20’s right out of college is simply not an ideal time for this kind of decisionmaking, so take some time to reassess every once in a while. Pursue a career that makes you feel useful and helpful, successful and able to support your family and lifestyle, and perhaps even something that you feel good about. A career that is giving back in some way, helping someone who needs it, fulfilling a demand that is being unmet.
We spend most of our days working. Make sure it inspires you.
II. Prioritize people and experiences over things. Sound familiar? One of my 2016 goals is to focus more on prioritizing my people. Let’s step away from the materialistic society that we’ve created and get back to valuing relationships and experiences over things. I’m pretty sure (or I certainly hope) that when I have reached the end of my days here on Earth and I’m looking back and reflecting on my life I will not recall the lovely expensive handbag that I bought myself with that bonus at work. Or the fancy car that I toted my kids around in. I sincerely hope and expect that I will be reflecting on the adventures that I have had, the friendships that have gotten me through the good and the bad times, and the memories of birthdays and holidays and getaways with my family and my people.
Weekend winedown with some of our favorites!
III. Experience the world through others’ eyes. Put yourself in others’ shoes. Make an effort to consider where people are coming from. Learn about the people with whom you are interacting, their motivations, the experiences that they have had that are informing their decisions and mannerisms and actions. See the world through your children’s eyes. Take the time to talk to people and humanize your days and your experiences. Connect with people. Have some compassion. I am increasingly alarmed by the lack of compassion that is being demonstrated on a weekly, daily, hourly basis. Where has our humanity gone? Let’s take some time to focus and work on being more compassionate and empathetic every single day.
Connect.
IV. Travel and Learn. For me, these two go hand in hand. Traveling is my number one favorite thing to do. I love to travel because I love to meet new people. To see new places. To be wowed by new and different and unique experiences. To be put outside of my comfort zone and be uncertain and push my boundaries. To conquer fears and form new hobbies and expand my horizons. And through each of these experiences, I will continue to learn, to gather knowledge and experiences that I can share with others, that I can use to connect with others, and to keep reigniting my sense of wonder at the truly amazing things that there are on this Earth. Never stop learning. Read. My goodness – read something meaningful and enjoyable and intellectual. Put down those gossip magazines and read something that will teach you something new. I love to read all kinds of books on lots of different topics and genres. I want to know all the things, to understand how things work and why, to understand how people live in other places, how they lived in other centuries, to escape my reality sometimes and slip into another world for a bit. And if you are just one of those people who doesn’t like to read (which I will never be able to understand, but I’ll accept it), try listening to a book on tape! There are some amazing services that allow you to listen to books each month for a subscription fee.
Exploring the glaciers in Patagonia last year.
V. Take time for yourself. This should probably be at the very top of the list. It is impossible to live a life fully lived if you don’t take time for yourself. Time to rest, to recover, to repair. Life is hard. Sometimes it’s harder than other times, and for some people it is harder than for other people, but regardless of individual circumstances we are all struggling with so many competing pressures and expectations and failures and successes and stresses. And the most important thing to do is to take care of yourself. Feed yourself well. Exercise and take care of your body and your soul. Sleep! Find yourself. Know yourself. Because it is not until you know yourself that you can be a good spouse, parent, partner, friend, coworker.
Taking some time to explore Point Reyes with Coconut
These are just a handful of my own thoughts about living a life fully lived. I encourage you to take a few hours sometime soon, enjoy a cup of coffee, curl up on the couch and really give some thought to what you will need to look back on your decades and consider your life one that has been fully lived.
BY Jackie
LOCATION San Francisco, California
